Finding out all of the signs of an unhealthy relationship can be hard to face. If you've ever been in a relationship that is stable and wonderful and then move to a relationship that is unhealthy, it might be easier, but if unhealthy relationships are all you've ever known, you might not realize just how great a stable relationship can be.
Let's face it: When we're newly coupled up, we tend to look at our partner -- and the budding relationship itself -- through a pair of proverbial rose-colored glasses.
Any flaws we detect in our partner are all too easily written off: He shies away from introducing you to his immediate family? It will happen when it happens. She has a tendency to leave dirty dishes and shoes scattered around the house? You're neat and orderly enough for the both of you.
But once you get real about your relationship and consider it for all that it is -- and all that it isn't -- there are some issues that are just too serious to overlook. So here are 10 signs of an unhealthy relationship so that you can see if you are in one:
- You find yourself wondering if you’re in the wrong relationship. It may sound painfully obvious, but your tendency to quiet those relationship doubts may end up being a huge regret later on. Immedeiately you start having the thoughts of whether you are in a right relationship, then that should mark the end of that relationship because your conscience is not so clear about the relationship.
2. Your partner controls who you see and what you do.
This might be the biggest red flag of all, Swithin says. “If you find that your partner is controlling your time with friends or family, your finances, clothing choices or how much makeup you wear, this is something to take very seriously."
3. Your partner makes all of the big relationship decisions.
You only get together when it's convenient for your boyfriend and only hang out with his family and friends. You've been to all of your girlfriend's work functions and friends' parties, but have stopped inviting her to any social gathering you attend -- she's made it crystal clear she's not interested.
Sound familiar? If your partner is calling all the shots and "you're just following their lead, desperate for a few crumbs," it might be time to re-evaluate the relationship.
4. You Take Each Other for Granted
One of the clearest signs of an unhealthy relationship is that you constantly are taking your partner for granted. Do you just assume that he is going to stay with you? Do you assume that your girlfriend is going to pack your lunch every day? These little things can actually break up a relationship and can make people resentful.
5. Lack of Trust
Do you find that in your relationship, you don't trust your man to go out by himself? Do you red through her emails? This is not a good relationship, girls and guys, this is actually one sign of an unhealthy relationship. You should be able to trust every single bit of your partner and should be able to trust them not to cheat.
6. Constant Insults
Does your relationship consist of constant sniping? Do you feel like you always have to be on the defense? Well girls, that is one of the top signs of an unhealthy relationship. Your boyfriend should make you feel amazing, he shouldn't constantly be putting you down. That could actually be a sign that you're in an emotionally abusive relationship.
7. When It’s Aways about Sex
Sex is an important part of a relationship but it’s not all of it. If you and your partner rarely communicate and the only time you’re close to one another is in bed, that’s not what a relationship is about! sex should be the icing on the cake and complement a strong, emotionally intimate bond.
8. Lack of Respect
A sure sign of an unhealthy relationship is having a lack of respect for one another. If he frequently breaks promises or criticizes you to make himself feel better, he’s not showing you much respect. You shouldn’t have to feel put down or feel like you’re not important!
9. Keeping Secrets
When you’re in a relationship, there should be no reason to keep secrets from your partner. If you feel that he’s not trustworthy or that he’ll use the information against you, this is definitely unhealthy! Couples should be able to talk openly with one another without having to keep secrets.
10. Social Isolation
When you isolate yourself completely from your family and also from your friends, that can be another sign of that your relationship isn’t healthy. You need your family and your friends to survive. You need other opinions in your life besides your partner's. So if you find that he expects you to just spend time with him, all of the time, that is a sign to be careful.